A Cute Little Sugar Dish, Consequence, and Tears
We had an Aunt Anita, she was the sister of Aunt Lilli, the loving wife of our Uncle Arthur, my father’s twin brother.
Aunt Lilli came to visit us often and my mama and her had a wonderful rapport and they had relaxing visits at teatime together. My mama would set a beautiful table with flowers or candles and always bake something with enticing fragrance. I remember well in later years that there was always a lot of laughter during Lilli’s visits. Our governess Mrs. Kramer would bring a lovely tray with goodies for us to the sitting area in our room so we could duplicate that visit. But there was studying involved, not laughter. My sister Friedl was five years old, and I was three. Anita was not a frequent visitor to our home, there had to be a specific reason for her to visit and they were usually short and to the point. Like this one. She had requested to be allowed to take Friedl and me on an outing for a ballet performance, hot chocolate and fancy cookies to a “Wald Café” by streetcar and a lovely stroll in the woods to the café. Since Mrs. Kramer had this afternoon free to take care of a personal matter, our mama finally gave in and got us ready. Anita made a point to pick what we should wear, how to style our hair and how we should behave, speak, answer promptly etc. Anita would love to tell my mama with a smile, how to raise children, which is absurd, since mama had found and hired Mrs. Kramer, a professional governess with a spotless reputation and knowledge of all the ins and outs of nurturing and educating children to become decent and well-rounded adults. After all this tension, my mama most likely regretted already giving in today to Anita.
After a nice walk through the majestic and beautiful woods, we arrived at the café and were seated by a large window overlooking the garden. Our table was decorated with pretty flowers and white, starched linens. It was very idyllic and relaxing, but I remember years later, I was always tense, reluctant and a little frightened around Aunt Anita, not so around Aunt Lilli or any other guest in our home. Aunt Anita had ordered hot chocolate for Friedl and me and tea for herself with sugar and milk.
There was a stage at the end of this large room where we would be watching a ballet class performing a children’s play. One would think that would be nice, Aunt Anita would be watching the Ballet and not Friedl or me, criticizing us: “Sit straight, don’t slouch, keep your knee’s together and don’t talk to your sister, WATCH!”
After the performance and the applause ended Anita took care of our bill. Friedl gave a big sigh of relieve, but I noticed a beautiful, cute sugar dish with a morsel of sugar from individually wrapped sugar cubes. While Anita settled the gratuity, I put my little forefinger in the cute dish to savor the morsel of sugar. WWIII started! Aunt Anita with the voice of a 1st Sergeant or General reprimanded me, my manners, my upbringing, my heritage…and my teachings. Friedl was so scared for me that she started crying and Anita’s rage went on. She pulled me off the chair and with her other hand she pulled Friedl behind her.
Arriving at our home, “cooler heads did NOT prevail” and Anita was in her “Charge mode.” Our mama knew right away, looking at us, that something went very wrong. She attended in her loving and soft way to Friedl and dried her tears and then to me, by that time I was shaking uncontrollably. Well, my mama had the audacity to ask Anita what went wrong and was informed, still in WWIII mode, about the terrible manners, in public, the cute little sugar dish and then she added still in the same tone, that she will take Friedl out for treats, but not this one, pointing at me.
Being a born diplomat, my mama, moving toward the front door, door handle in hand and with a determined look on her lovely face thanked Anita for this afternoon’s outing, but there shall NOT be any outings in the future for Anita any longer regardless of her wishes. The smile on our mama’s face fading, she closed the door behind Anita.
After all the tears and the fear disappeared, we were sitting all together, mama, Mrs. Kramer, Mrs. Nietsche, Friedl and I, having a little dish of ice cream. No mention of this ugly scene or the cute sugar dish, not now or ever again.
Oh my! Our little Ilona let her cute little finger stray into “forbidden territory “. A sugar bowl no less! I only hope she got to lick her finger tip before she was whisked away by that meany ole auntie! We all know that our dear Ilona never lost her sense of adventure, and might we say, a sense of mischief. It’s part of why we love her so much. She can come to my home anytime and help herself to heaping spoonfuls of sugar! What a cute story! Thanks! Hope the tears vanished quickly in the arms of their dear mum.
It sounds to me like Aunt Anita was the one who needed an education about manners! Her behavior must have caused quite a scene, and I feel sad and offended that such young children were treated so poorly. Thank goodness that Ilona and Friedl’s mother had the good sense to put an end to the outings with someone who obviously had no idea how to treat children. Thank you Ilona, for sharing this glimpse into your childhood, and thanks to Marcie for sharing it on your website. It is great to have the website back.